Its a new thing I've tried and I'm not sure if I can call this a poem. But until my creativity helps me coin a name for this, I'll call it a poem. This poem is about events and a perspective look at those events from different, especially opposite, angles.
**************************If only I get God's grace
from this benevolent act,
I'll be a millionnaire.An aspiring millionnaire giving alms to a beggar.
If only he gives me a Rupee,
I'll have enough money for a morning tea.The beggar.
If only I cut him in the right places,
I'll succeed.A surgeon in an operation theatre.
If only he cuts me in the right places,
I'll survive.The patient in the operation theatre.
If only they select me,
I'll stop existing
and start living.An orphan girl in an adoption queue.
If only we select her,
we'll have a live-in maid for free.The adopting couple.
If only you knew that you have what we lack,
you could've been happier.An adult observing kids at play.
If only you knew that you have what we lack,
you would cease to be kids.Another observer.
8 comments:
:-)))))))
Nice .... could have been longer....
Overall.... most of ur 'literary work' - poems and others...
Most of them are abt perceptions, different perspectives....
I feel that way....
Poorvi
Good thought, could have been longer too
Anil
Hi Kamlesh,
After a long time, I got a chance to comment.
Well, all your previous creative creations (for which i didn't reply ) were definitely very good. But this last one I liked the most. ( May be a LIFO way of thinking )
Like every time, this time also, I liked this new style of thought.
I find the adopting couple's perspective a bit on the negative side. There would be many couple for whom the perspective may be same as the orphan girl. But especially in the context of this poem what you
wrote is perfect.
For me it can be a poem. But will be eager to know what you name this style of writing.
A nice poem. Well done.
Best Regards,
Sunil
i like the way you depict things in your poem. Always interesting and so
many times insightful
Anshuman Gupta
If only we select her,
we'll have a live-in maid for free.
The adopting couple.
I differ in this case. This could be in 90% cases. But just think from a
childless couple's perspective. I know a couple who are having problems as it's been 6 years after marriage and they don't have a child. It's really painful. Both of them want to adopt a kid but are not allowed to adopt as there is strong resistance from their parents. They could easily revolt and go for it but then the child will not be accepted as a family member. So they are trying to pacify their parents so that they can adopt a child. What would you say about this couple? Would you still say they want a live-in maid?
It was a sensitive poem and i really liked it.....
Keep It up..........
Waiting for a Gift of Your Book Soon....
Sonal
This was a gud one...Hmm...Perspective of life,varies so much...Each one of us are God's creations..Dunno y there is soo much disparity in the way each of us is created...
Have you read Sidney Sheldon's 'Night is Falling'...He describes the full spectrum of emotions a Black Handicapped orphaned child goes thru standing everyday in the queue to get selected...it was so very heart wrenching-ur line about the orphan girl reminded me of exactly that...
Ur poems r nice...Continue writing them ...:)
Sudha
Good one... :-)
If Only "" then I "" .... thats how mind traps us in illusions.
There is always a chain of "If Only" ... one after the other. The moment one is satisfied, other "If Only" is born.
and at some point in life human being realizes that he is not driving "If Only" ... its this "If Only" desires that are driving his life....
the "Turning point in life... "
Cheers,
Heena.
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